The gauntlet of conditional love deals with its distortions by using the four pillars

The four pillars or another way of referring to the tools of your existential immune system.

This includes proper use of anxiety and anger, conflict embracement, self-regard, and evolutionary based thinking.

For example, when growing up it seemed that to be loved Jonny had to be a high achiever, be perfect, minimize his own needs and defer to others for an opinion of himself. This meant his love for himself was “conditioned” on meeting these criteria.

If he uses the four pillars, he will discover that there are no conditions for self-love.

Self-love is based on what he is as a human being, not who he is at any moment in time.

We invite you to join the conversation and share the article! What love conditions have you been "conditioned" to believe about yourself? Post a comment or send us an email at and visit for additional enriching content and tools for your transformation!

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